Leaving Love
by xXxCyanidexKissesxXx
Summary: Rin stubbornly leaves Sess and goes with the inu group hoping Sess will come and get her. Will he prove his love for her or will her heart remain broken from his indifference? Read and Find out! Tis awsome! RinXSess and a little Kagura
1. Leaving You

-1"Lord Sesshomaru?" I called out uncertainly, Jaken looked just as panicked, had he left us to see that Kagura woman again? I sighed heavily and sat against a tree cradling my head in my arms. Why did he seem to like her? Why? Why doesn't he notice me?

"Rin, get up." I glanced up it was Lord Sesshomaru, his calm voice was unnerving.

"Yes, mi lord." I muttered making it to my feet smoothing my dress against my thighs. I had turned 16 last summer and he still did not take much notice in my growing up body. "Come Rin." I wanted to say 'No' just so he'd turn to look at me but I wasn't sure I had the courage. But if Sesshomaru had taught me anything it was to be strong. It angered me I wouldn't use his training just because it would be him I was using it on.

"Lord, I do not wish to come." I whispered my eyes downcast, I could hear the wind whisper as he spun around gracefully, I was glad I wasn't looking at his face, I was afraid of his outrage.

"Why not?" He inquired coldly, I flinched.

"I-I." I sighed, what was the point? What was I going to say? I can't come with you anymore because I'm madly in love with you and you won't give me the time of day? Ya, I don't think that'd get me far, but my heart was beginning to hurt and I was sick of trying to pretend it didn't. "Nevermind." I whispered, tears gathering. I could hear him inhale deeply, before tipping my head up with a poison claw to look into my glossy eyes.

"Why are you crying?" He asked curiously. I shook my head not wanting to answer.

"It's nothing." I answered briskly, fighting the tears with all my might. Go away! I pled. It was un-needed for the minute I responded with my shaking answer he had spun around and begun to walk away.

"Wait for me, mi lord!" Jaken called. I held myself and leaned against a tree, would he notice if I didn't follow? He ignored Jaken, would he do the same to me? Would he forget me, just like that? I saw him glance at me from the corner of his eye, a fleeting glimpse of anger flamed his appearance before he ordered me to come. I didn't hesitate to run after him.

"Rin you shouldn't be so disrespectful to Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken scolded, waving the staff of two heads at me. I gave him a gentle push with my foot and he tipped over, letting out an angry AHH! Sesshomaru glanced over his shoulder and must have saw my rage for he stopped.

"Rin, you need to go eat. Jaken accompany her."

"But mi lord she is a young woman! She does not need my assistance." He sputtered, I smiled what an opportunity!

"I agree with Jaken my Lord." I told him. He glanced me, the heat of his stare made me shudder. He turned on his heels and began walking away. Jaken taking it as victory followed him. I knew where they were heading I didn't have to worry about losing them, the Western lands weren't far from here and Sesshomaru had planned to take up his fathers place before Inuyasha had the brains to.

I turned away from them and began my lonely walk away, alone. I didn't wish to accompany Lord Sesshomaru for awhile. Maybe in a couple days id rejoin them, make them worry. I wondered if Sesshomaru would worry, he would wouldn't he? A knot formed in my throat as I walked away.

If Sesshomaru wouldn't come for me I wouldn't go back. I loved him and I needed to know if he loved me back, is that so wrong? I was just afraid he wouldn't come for me. The hearbreak would be worse than anything I've had to endure so far.

I kept walking, skipping once and awhile, singing songs that I made up from the top of my head.

When the sun began to go down I picked a small clearing to make camp a small fire would suffice. I laid down to sleep, dreams of Sesshomaru plagued every minute of my restless rest.

When the sun rose above the large trees, I awoke to a feeling of dread. A dream clung to me like an unwanted shadow, I tried to shake it but it clung to me stubbornly. I didn't remember what it had been about but the feelings were still raw, like it had happened. I just brushed it aside as I picked up camp and snuffed out the unused fire. My stomach growled but I ignored it.

I began my walk through the forest at a light skip, winding deeper and deeper into a forest that I didn't recgonize. One of the few forests I've encountered that I hadn't been lectured about by Jaken.

"Sesshomaru!" A mans voice cried before a man dressed in a gaudy red suit jumped out of the trees at me.

"Inuyasha, that's not Sesshomaru." The woman with black hair on his back pointed out, he shook her off him.

"I see that, stupid." He growled.

"Well sorry!" She hissed back. I cleared my throat before they began fighting, I recognized them both, Inuyasha and Kagome. I had ran into them many times in my youth when I had first begun to follow Inuyasha. Lord Sesshomaru had begun to lose intrest in Inuyasha and so I had saw less and less of them.

"Isn't that his human companion?" Inuyasha asked gruffly. Kagome smiled.

"Rin! That's you isn't it?" She asked, I smiled and nodded, we had both grown since she last saw me. She was 19 now, almost 20.

"Where's Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha asked, I frowned.

"I left him…" I whispered. I assumed Kagome understood because she rubbed my back comfortingly.

"Well where is he?" Inuyasha demanded, I shrugged.

"I dunno." I lied.

"Hey Rin, where are you off to?" Kagome asked, I shrugged again.  
"Anywhere away from Lord Sesshomaru." Kagomes face lit up.

"Why don't you come with us?!" I smiled it was a great idea! Sesshomaru would never suspect I was with his younger brother! Maybe it'd even make him jealous! I smiled how grand would that be? I eagerly accepted, and Inuyasha with a blunt 'Feh' led Kagome and I back to the group of others.

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Puh-lease Review!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is my first SessXRin fic ever!


	2. Kohaku a lost companion

-1"KOHAKU!" Sango screamed as she disappeared into the forest, Kohaku… It rang a bell, although however faint. Kagome pulled me alone behind her as we stumbled after the crazed Sango. Needless to say the past 2 weeks had been full of adventure for me. Inuyasha and the gang never kept me bored that's for sure. Recently Kagome had sensed the jewel shard and it just so happened to be Sango's younger brother, Kohaku. It bugged me that his name was there, in my memory yet still out of my grasp. I shook my head in annoyance, why couldn't I remember?

"Will you two hurry up?" Inuyasha asked before grabbing us both and tucking each under one of his arms. Kagome's face fell. I had to giggle this wasn't something not to expect from Inuyasha, he was pretty stupid.

"Put us down Inuyasha!" Kagome ordered, I figured she thought her pride slightly altered since she hadn't willingly jumped onto his back.

"Will you pipe down?" He answered irritably, I giggled again. Kagome sighed and went quiet, good old Kagome. I realized she had to have the patience of a Saint to put up with him. I think she'd almost appreciate it if Lord Sesshomaru finally finished him off. But no, she was in love with him as he was her, it was plain as day on their faces. I had to wonder if my love for Sesshomaru was so obvious.

Speaking of Sesshomaru he hadn't turned up. I was starting to doubt that he even notices my absence. It hurts, a lot. Do I not deserve him? He could've at least come to find me or put in a little effort! Like having Jaken come find me, is that so bad? At least it would prove he cares. Which of course he doesn't. I sighed heavily attracting a sideways look from Kagome.

"Are you okay, Rin?" She asked her big raven eyes bright. I smiled and shook my head around her how could you not be optimistic? Of course I used to be like that too, until I realized my love for Sesshomaru and how he'd never feel the same.

"KOHAKU!" Sango cried again, my attention focused in on the monk and the demon slayer clad in pink and black armor rode on Kirara the demon cat. A young man, clad in the same armor as Sango only it was yellow and black, who was a little older than me jumped from tree to tree just above Sango's reach. Suddenly Sango leaped into the air and tackled him out of a tree, they plummeted to the ground Kohaku on bottom. The monk Miroku, jumped off of Kirara just in time to break their fall. Needless to say he looked a little squished. Miroku somehow managed to wiggle out from under the two siblings and stood on the side by Inuyasha who had finally released Kagome and me. "Kohaku!" Sango said through gritted teeth looking into her brothers eyes. A flicker of understanding flashed in the boys eyes just to be swallowed back up by the vacancy they usually displayed.

"Kagome, can't your touch purify jewel shards?" Miroku asked, Kagome nodded reluctantly.

"Yeah but I don't think that's going to work." She admitted. Sango was glaring at her with eyes of onyx, I felt Kagome shrink back.

"Please try, Kagome!" Sango said passionately, it gave me goosebumps. Kagome gave a dedicated nod and stepped over, Sango forced Kohaku onto his stomach, pinning him there. Kagome hesitantly reached out to touch the glowing cloth, nothing happened. Sango hissed in frustration before ripping away part of the boys outfit to reveal his pale flesh. Kagome nodded again to touch the flesh, she touched it hesitantly then pulled away like she'd been burned.

"That's never happened before." She murmured rubbing her finger on her skirt.

"S-Sango?" The boy asked from underneath her. Sango released Kohaku and sat down next to him.

"Y-yes?" The boy sat up, horror bright in his chocolate eyes, they were watering. An involuntary cry escaped Sango's throat.

"I-I killed them, Father, and the villagers. What have I done?" He asked shakily hiding his shamed face in his arms sadly.

"Kohaku." Sango whispered painfully. "It's not your fault, you were under Narakus spell." She said Narakus name with disguist. Kohaku sat there, shaking as his sister cradled him in her arms.

"I don't like this, it might be a trap." Inuyasha pointed out.

"But we have to believe it's not." Kagome told him. I remained quiet. Suddenly the boy lifted his head and stared at me, his mouth in a perfect 'o'.

"Rin?" I nodded, okay so he knows me? Then it struck me, Kohaku. He had tried to kill me once, then Sesshomaru had almost killed him… Kohaku.

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Okay well R&R sorry it was short!!!


	3. Defiance At Its Best

I watch Kohaku as he stares into the fire, eyes glittering with unshed tears. I move a little closer to him and rest a comforting hand on his knee. "It's going to be okay, you know." He shakes his head and clutches my hand in his own tightly. I stare at the fingers intertwined, bewildered. Is this affection? Is this what it feels like to be- attracted to someone? I sigh. This isn't how my heart feels when I'm with Sesshomaru. But maybe then the feelings I have for Sesshomaru aren't- real. Maybe it's what you feel towards a father. I sigh and shake my head. I am so confused.

Its only been a few days since Kohaku's joined us but I've already grown quite fond of him. I'm assuming it's the age thing... I've never really been friends with anyone before.

"Rin?" I glance up at Sango who is eyeing us suspiciously, I blush.

"Yes?"

"How long are you going to stay with us?" I shrug and look downward. Am I not welcome?

"I'm glad Rin's here. If she wasn't- I'd be so bored." My eyes meet Kohakus and I smile.

"Thanks." My face is burning. I can see Kagome watching me, a faint smile on her lips, Inuyasha standing behind her, kimono's touching.

"So you don't have any idea?" Sango prods.

"Honestly? I don't have anywhere to go... I mean, I don't know where Lord Sesshomaru has gone... and- and I'm not sure he wants me in his company anyway." I clench my teeth together, willing away the knot in my throat.

"Rin?" Kagomes voice is gentle, I look to her.

"Yeah?"

"Have you been waiting for Sesshomaru to get you?" I nod slowly. Kagome laughs and shakes her head. "I wish you would have told us sooner. The man has been tracking us for a week. Why do you think we've been moving so fast? We thought you were trying to get away from him." I blink a few times.

"Really?" Kagome nods, grinning. Happiness floods up through my heart. How could I have doubted him?

"Hey Rin?" Kohaku asks, I turn my attention to him, joy bubbling off me.

"You wanna go for a walk with me?" I can see his face turning red in the firelight.

"Sure."

"Don't go far." Sango warns, I can only imagine how afraid she is of losing her brother again.

"Don't worry sister, we'll be safe." He pulls me up and leads me into the forest, not letting his grip on me go. "It's so strange, being here- with her... After what I've done." His voice is hardly a whisper, I wonder if he's just thinking out loud.

"You'll get used to it." He shakes his head.

"She's not the same- I'm not the same. It's like we don't know each other." He's choking back sobs. I stop him and bring him into my embrace. He clings to me, sobbing.

"It's going to be okay. It'll happen, you two just need time. You have been under Narakus spell for quite some time, you know." He raises his head from my shoulder to look at me, something, not tears, shining in his eyes. I'm lost as he leans towards me, lips barely brushing mine. Then I realize- he's _kissing _me. I close my eyes and press my lips harder against his, lost in the moment of my very first kiss.

"RIN!" I spin around and face Jaken to my complete horror. Stupid little toad! "How dare you kiss this boy! Sesshomaru is going to be very displeased!" Sesshomaru... Where is Sesshomaru? Anger flares in every part of my body, ready to escape.

"Displeased? Don't talk to _me _about being _displeased_! Do you know how long I've waited for you two to find me? To come for me? Do you know how long I waited for _him _to show up? Only to find you, his little toad servant was sent out to fetch me?! Big bad Sesshomaru can't do anything for himself! Big bad Sesshomaru doesn't have any feelings-"

"Rin." My heart stops in my chest at about the same time as my words.

"L-lord Sesshomaru." Jaken whispers meekly. I can't look at him, I can feel his indifference to my words like icicles piercing my heart.

"K-Kohaku, let's go." I murmur grabbing his hand and pulling him back the way we came.

"If you favor the human boys life you'll make him go back to camp- alone." Tears are filling my eyes and dripping down my cheeks.

"I won't leave you, Rin." Kohaku protests passionately. I push him away from me.

"Just go." I murmur, choked. Kohaku practically runs away.

"Come, Rin, you've been gone long enough." I sit down and bury my head in my knees. "Rin!" I flinch but refuse to move. I won't- I can't. He came- he came because I'm like property to him. Property he probably thought Inuyasha had kidnapped. When he knew I wasn't with the half demon he didn't find it necessary to come along to retrieve me. He probably came in the end just because Jaken wasn't going fast enough for his taste. "Rin." His poison claws wrap around my arm and pull me to my feet. I try to pull away from him. "Rin." His voice is monotone. My eyes flash to his defiantly.

"Don't you ever get angry? Don't you ever want to scream? Don't you ever want to cry? Don't you ever change you're freaking _voice?!"_ I'm screaming in his face, something I doubt he appreciates.

"I don't know what is wrong with you but whatever it is- ends now."

"No. It doesn't. It's never going to end! Don't you see?" He lets me pull myself out of his grasp. Tears are stomping down my cheeks like little toy soldiers, leaving their tracks glossy on my flesh.

"What are you talking about?" He's growing impatient- finally a mood shift!... However a negative one...

"Nevermind." He turns from me and begins walking away. I wonder if he'll leave me this time. I wonder if I'm brave enough to stay and find out. I wonder. I wonder. I wonder.


End file.
